Thank you!

Finding containers and roles that unleash our best is one of those continuous journeys in life. I think it’s also one of the most important ones, since it’s the people we spend our time with and the problems we work on.

First, your exploration of success at Microsoft. You walk the walk, J.D. Your body of work *is* game-changing. You have indeed been changing the world. And as far as I can tell you are going to continue to do so.

Second, I realized all-too-painfully that the rules required for success in my role weren’t compatible with my own goals. I recognized that I could continue to beat my head against the wall. Or adopt the strategem, “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”. Instead, I changed the rules..by changing roles. The new rules in the new role will allow me to thrive.

Thank you.

Sometimes just by stating your problem or challenge a new way opens up new doors and new possibilities. Play with your language until you find the key that works for you. That’s your ultimate power.

@ Lana

Whenever I need to make a meaningful change in my life, it’s always been about turning SHOULDs into MUSTs. It’s such a simple, but powerful lens.

@ Josh

Thank you. I’m glad your visits are always worth it!

@ Mama Zen

Thank you. Once you know this lens, you’ll see it show up time and again.

Thank you — Mint is my new bar!

@ Karl

Great sythesis and reflection — yes, it starts with our rules and we need to know what we need to meet our needs.

@ Melissa

Incongruence is actually an antipattern in NLP. Getting your actions to meet your rules, or getting your beliefs to match your behaviors is a key to success.

@ Jannie

I like the “I want to” addition … it fits perfectly well.

I think Microsoft culture and Bill Gates taught us to be better at checking our assumptions.

@ Eduard

Thank you. “Aim for what we see as success” is well put.

@ JB

Judgments aren’t good or bad either, just thinking makes them so. What’s helped me with judgments is measuring against effectiveness … basically, is this moving me towards or away from what I want to accomplish.

@ Positively Present

Thank you.

@ Avani

You’re right, it’s a great approach for digging deeper into self-awareness.

Making your own rules is the surest path to never being surprise, unless you surprise yourself in a good way.

Keep doing what you do! I’m always glad when I stop by over here:)

Josh

Having to invent a new game with new rules is sometimes just overwhelming.

here’s a little example: paying for health ins. all my life, then the economic crash and the ins. co. changes rules…and ups the fees, So now one can not go to the DR. because deductible and co-pays are too big…Trying to figure out dropping health ins. all together? Can’t afford to get health care, can’t retire, lost retirement funds will they go back up in time? Can not sell real estate….pay cuts to hold on, and now the State redefines certification/lic. requirements and there it no money to get re-certified…now folks in Washington DC want to get rid of Medicare….
For me the rules are now how do I want to die, my way, and not by others rules?
I am creative and quite a risk taker….and if this is overwhelming game change for me…just think of all the folks who are not creative and rule changers….