One of the keys to effectiveness is to know and show yourself enough. If you know yourself well enough, you can share relevant information to improve communication and connect with others. One tool to help you with this is the Johari Window. I first learned about the Johari Window in one of my leadership training sessions and it peaked my interest. It’s a simple model for interpersonal awareness. If you’ve ever struggled with TMI (too much information) or self-disclosure, the Johari Window is your friend. The Johari Window was originally created by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham in 1955 as a tool to help people understand their interpersonal communication and relationships.

It’s hard to live your values if you don’t know what they are. My dictionary defines a value as “something (as a principle or quality) intrinsically valuable or desirable.” That sounds about right. Clarifying your values is one of the first steps towards knowing yourself. You would think you know yourself after all these years, but a lot of things get in the way. For example, maybe you never took the time to write down your top five values. Or maybe, you got caught up in what you think you “should” value or what other people scripted for you. Either way, now’s the time to figure out your values.

How do you get the people on your side or inspire a vision or change the world? First win the heart. I’m blogging on this because it’s a lesson I’ve learned that shows up in so many ways, time and again. I see it in thought leaders. I see it in people leaders. I see it in everyday, conversational exchange. This is one of those ah-ha’s that when it sinks in, you find opportunities to apply it every day to improve your effectiveness.

Twenty-five years of business in 32 countries has honed my understanding of what sets successful business people apart from those whom success is an elusive quest. Five characteristics persist in leaders I have been honored to know. Although there are more than five characteristics, these five characteristics top the list.

I found an interesting article about contextual decision making. It’s “A Leader’s Framework for Decision Making,” an article in Harvard Business Review. The idea is about tailoring your decision making approach based on the context. You can use the Cynefin Framework to figure out which context you’re operating in, so you can choose the most effective response. The five contexts are simple, complicated, complex, chaotic, and disorder. The key is to determine whether to categorize, analyze, probe or act.

How do you figure out what your organization or business is really about? It’s one thing to know it intuitively. It’s another to be able to share it or have meaningful dialogue. This is extremely important in an economy that’s contracting. Obviously, it’s important when the economy is expanding too, but when the economy is contracting, it forces you to take a really good look at why the business exists. Why do people fund you? What’s the value? What’s the intrinsic value of what you do versus what’s the market value? Have you found the right efficiencies or does it cost you a $5 to produce that item that nobody will pay you more than $1 for? Here’s the tests I use to quickly know what a team, organization, or business is really about

One leadership style doesn’t fit all. According to the Situational Leadership II model, the leadership style depends on the development levels within the team. Some people might need more motivation while others need more capability. A quick cutting question to ask is, “do they want to do it?” Another question to ask is, “do they know how to do it?” These two questions can very quickly help you figure out the right approach.

When you find yourself in a situation that isn’t working for you, analyze it. You can use a simple frame for analysis: adapt, adjust or avoid. This frame can help you improve your effectiveness for any situation. For any situation that isn’t working, determine whether to adapt, adjust or avoid that situation. When you analyze, also look for the patterns. Chances are, you’ll find that you behave similarly in similar situations. Once you know the pattern and what to look for, you can spot these situations faster and improve your effectiveness.

If you coach others or you need to encourage change or if you need to change yourself, the key is to use questions. Lead others to their own insight or your advice may fall on deaf ears. You know the saying, “you can lead the horse to water, but you can’t make them drink.” Part of the reason is, asking questions puts people into a more receptive state. When people have their own “ah has” it actually creates an emotional link. This helps the insight stick. The key of course is to ask the right questions.

You need to test your decisions against reality. A lot of decisions might sound good at the time or look good on paper. When the rubber meets the road, you might find there were a lot of assumptions or it simply was a bad idea. Some ideas also become obsolete by the time they’re implemented. To really test your decisions, you need feedback loops that provide first-hand experience. Nothing beats seeing it for yourself. A written report never conveys the same information. I think the key is that first-hand experience includes an emotional aspect that gets lost in translation. It’s that emotional aspect that can be your best gauge of whether something is really working. It’s not that you need to distrust people in their feedback, it’s that you need to distrust communication.

I’m realizing more and more how stories help you drive a point home. It’s one thing to make a point, it’s another for your story to make the point for you. If your ideas aren’t sticking, or you’re not getting buy in, maybe a compelling story is the answer.
Stories at Work
Crafting useful stories is an art, and, now, apparently a science. Srinath pointed me to Stories at Work on 50Lessons.com. The video shares a story about using stories as a catalyst for change and a recipe …

Why do people resist change, even when it’s for their own good? Well, believe it or not, your own body can actually work against you. The good news is, if you know how your body works, you can make changes easier, or at least know what to expect. David Rock and Jeffrey Schwartz write about two reasons why people resist change, in their article, “The Neuroscience of Leadership”, in strategy+business magazine.

“Anger always comes from frustrated expectations." — Elliott Larson
How much do your expectations shape what you get?  A lot.
According to the Pygmalion effect,  you get what you expect.  However, the latest research is showing that your expectations and attitude play a larger role in your perception than we previously thought. 
David Rock and Jeffrey Schwartz write about how your expectations and attitude shape your reality in their article, "The Neuroscience of Leadership", in strategy+business magazine.
Key Take Aways Here are my key take …

Why do many leadership efforts and organizational change initiatives fail? The state of the art is not the state of the practice. Luckily, there are some new insights that can help shape new management practices. David Rock and Jeffrey Schwartz summarize some counterintuitive conclusions in their article, “The Neuroscience of Leadership”, in strategy+business magazine.

Editor’s note: This is a guest post by author Jim Kouzes.  Jim is co-author of the award-winning and best selling book, The Leadership Challenge.  This post is a follow up to Jim’s previous guest post, The Top Ten Leadership Lessons, which generated a lot of feedback and some great questions.  Jim’s responses were long enough for another post.  Here it is …
I want to thank all who commented on my post.  I greatly appreciate your graciousness and your questions.  I have tried to respond to several of the questions …

This is a guest post on lessons learned in leadership from Jim Kouzes.

Photo by Rafael Amado Deras
I got some relevant training for today’s world.  The training was “Influencing without Authority” and it was based on the book, Influence Without Authority (2nd Edition).   The focus was how to succeed when you don’t have authority and control over execution.  This is a common scenario in cross-team, cross-group scenarios.  At Microsoft, you don’t get rewarded by saying, “…if only I had control over authority and execution … I would be successful.”  
This training is actually useful beyond just the work scenarios.  You can …

Photo by SqueakyMarmot
If you need to be persuasive, you need to know this secret.  It’s how people who influence without authority improve their effectiveness.  The secret is … character trumps emotion trumps logic.  If you win the heart, the mind follows.  On the other hand, if you win the mind, the heart doesn’t always follow.  For an example of character, think about the impact of the right people in the room asking the right questions. 
When you know this secret, it all makes sense.  You didn’t need more data …

Photo by Royalty-free image collection
Whenever I take on a project, one of the first things I do is look at the system.  If I know the system I’m in, I can produce more effective results.  To figure out the system, I try to map out the context, flows of work, key events, and who does what.  
With or Against the SystemOnce I have a map of the system, I have a bird’s-eye view of how to get leverage.  I can then either try to get results by working …

If you need to interview people, what are the key questions to ask when you’re interviewing someone?  In How to Run Successful Projects III: The Silver Bullet (3rd Edition), Fergus O’Connell suggests using three basic questions during the interview to help you evaluate your candidates.
3 Questions to Ask When You Interview
The three questions that O’Connell suggests are:

What have you done?
What do you want to do?
What are you like?

What Have You Done?
The question tells you about the candidates past experience and qualifications.  O’Connell says you can find out more on this …