“Your career success in the workplace of today – independent of technical expertise – depends on the quality of your people skills.” — Max Messmer
This is a list of my favorite and noteworthy books on interpersonal skills.
When I think of interpersonal skills, I think of assertiveness, body language, conflict, conversation starters, influence, negotiation, networking, relationships, teamwork, and trust.
The books below help provide interpersonal skills, including mindsets, methodologies, and methods. I test many of the books below while leading programs, projects, and initiatives in environments ranging from simple to complex.
I put the bulk of the list in categories so you can explore relevant books and you can easily compare against your existing leadership books library.
10 Best Interpersonal Skills Books
- Coping with Difficult Bosses
- Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High
- Dealing with People You Can’t Stand
- Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions
- Get Them On Your Side
- How To Win Friends and Influence People
- How to Work a Room, Revised Edition: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing
- Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion
- The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life’s Dreams
- The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything
Best Interpersonal Skills Books by Category
Assertiveness, Confidence
- People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts
- Speaking Up: What to Say to Your Boss and Everyone Else Who Gets on Your Case
- The 5 Essential People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts (Dale Carnegie Training)
Charm, Charisma, Attraction, Likeability
- 25 Ways to Win with People: How to Make Others Feel Like a Million Bucks
- Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions
- How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less
- Irresistible Attraction: Secrets of Personal Magnetism
- The Art of Seduction
- The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life’s Dreams
Body Language
- Emotions Revealed, Second Edition: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve Communication and Emotional Life
- Never Be Lied to Again: How to Get the Truth In 5 Minutes Or Less In Any Conversation Or Situation
- The Definitive Book of Body Language
- What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People
- You Can Read Anyone
Conflict
- Interpersonal Conflict
- Make Peace With Anyone: Breakthrough Strategies to Quickly End Any Conflict, Feud, or Estrangement
- The Eight Essential Steps to Conflict Resolution
- The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
Conversations, Conversation Starters
- Conversationally Speaking : Tested New Ways to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness
- How To Start A Conversation And Make Friends
- How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
- How To Win Friends and Influence People
- The Complete Book of Questions: 1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion
- The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression!
- What Do I Say Next?: Talking Your Way to Business and Social Success
Coping Skills
- 104 Activities That Build: Self-Esteem, Teamwork, Communication, Anger Management, Self-Discovery, Coping Skills
- Coping with Difficult Bosses
- Dealing with People You Can’t Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst
Crucial Conversations, Difficult Conversations, Confrontations
- Crucial Confrontations: Tools for Resolving broken promises, violated expectations, and bad behavior
- Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High
- Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
- Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time
- Lifescripts: What to Say to Get What You Want in Life’s Toughest Situations
Forgiving
- Forgive and Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don’t Deserve (Plus)
- Forgiveness Is a Choice: A Step-By-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope (Apa Lifetools)
- The Art of Forgiving
- Total Forgiveness
Habits, Principles, Practices
- How to Instantly Connect with Anyone: 96 All-New Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
- Mastering Personal and Interpersonal Skills: Key Techniques for Effective Decision-Making and Personal Success (Masters S.)
- Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success
- Winning with People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time
Influence, Persuasion, Rapport
- Covert Persuasion: Psychological Tactics and Tricks to Win the Game
- Get Anyone to Do Anything: Never Feel Powerless Again–With Psychological Secrets to Control and Influence Every Situation
- Get Them On Your Side
- Influence: Science and Practice
- Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (Collins Business Essentials)
- Introducing NLP: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)
- Leadership Through People Skills
- Persuasion Skills Black Book: Practical NLP Language Patterns for Getting The Response You Want
- Positive Impacts: Discovering the Keys to Better Interpersonal Skills
- The Art of Woo: Using Strategic Persuasion to Sell Your Ideas
- The Power of Nice: How to Conquer the Business World With Kindness
- The Psychology of Persuasion: How To Persuade Others To Your Way Of Thinking
- The Science of Influence: How to Get Anyone to Say “Yes” in 8 Minutes or Less!
- Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive
Interpersonal Skills
- Interpersonal Skills in Organizations
- Messages: The Communication Skills Book
, by by Suzanne de Janasz
- Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships
Meetings, Events
- Good in a Room: How to Sell Yourself (and Your Ideas) and Win Over Any Audience
- How to Work a Room, Revised Edition: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing
- The Art of Mingling: Proven Techniques for Mastering Any Room
- Thinking on Your Feet: How to Communicate Under Pressure
Negotiation Skills
- Bargaining for Advantage: Negotiation Strategies for Reasonable People 2nd Edition
- Getting Past No
- Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
- Secrets of Power Negotiating
, by Roger Dawson
Networking
- Masters of Networking: Building Relationships for Your Pocketbook and Soul
- Personal Village, How to Have People in Your Life by Choice, Not Chance
Relationships
- Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex
- Relationships 101 (Maxwell, John C.)
- Unlimited Power : The New Science Of Personal Achievement
- Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last
Strategies, Tactics
- Executive Power: Use the Greatest Collection of Psychological Strategies to Create an Automatic Advantage in Any Business Situation
- PeopleSmart: Developing Your Interpersonal Intelligence
- The Hard Truth About Soft Skills: Workplace Lessons Smart People Wish They’d Learned Sooner
Teamwork
- Antipatterns: Identification, Refactoring, and Management (Auerbach Series on Applied Software Engineering)
- Collaboration: How Leaders Avoid the Traps, Create Unity, and Reap Big Results
- Teamwork 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know (101 (Thomas Nelson))
- The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork Workbook: Embrace Them and Empower Your Team
- The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable (J-B Lencioni Series)
Trust
- The Conversation: How Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships
- The Courage to Trust: A Guide to Building Deep and Lasting Relationships
- The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything
- Trust & Betrayal in the Workplace: Building Effective Relationships in Your Organization, Second edition