“Your career success in the workplace of today – independent of technical expertise – depends on the quality of your people skills.” — Max Messmer
This is a list of my favorite and noteworthy books on interpersonal skills.
When I think of interpersonal skills, I think of assertiveness, body language, conflict, conversation starters,influence, negotiation, networking, relationships, teamwork, and trust.
The books below help provide interpersonal skills, including mindsets, methodologies, and methods. I test many of the books below while leading programs, projects, and initiatives in environments ranging from simple to complex.
I put the bulk of the list in categories so you can explore relevant books and you can easily compare against your existing leadership books library.
10 Best Books on Interpersonal Skills
- Coping with Difficult Bosses
- Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High
- Dealing with People You Can’t Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst
- Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions
- Get Them On Your Side
- How To Win Friends and Influence People
- How to Work a Room, Revised Edition: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing
- Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (Collins Business Essentials)
- The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life’s Dreams
- The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything
Best Books on Interpersonal Skills by Category
Assertiveness, Confidence
- People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts
- Speaking Up: What to Say to Your Boss and Everyone Else Who Gets on Your Case
- The 5 Essential People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts (Dale Carnegie Training)
Charm, Charisma, Attraction, Likeability
- 25 Ways to Win with People: How to Make Others Feel Like a Million Bucks
- Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions
- How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less
- Irresistible Attraction: Secrets of Personal Magnetism
- The Art of Seduction
- The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life’s Dreams
Body Language
- Emotions Revealed, Second Edition: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve Communication and Emotional Life
- Never Be Lied to Again: How to Get the Truth In 5 Minutes Or Less In Any Conversation Or Situation
- The Definitive Book of Body Language
- What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People
- You Can Read Anyone
Conflict
- Interpersonal Conflict
- Make Peace With Anyone: Breakthrough Strategies to Quickly End Any Conflict, Feud, or Estrangement
- The Eight Essential Steps to Conflict Resolution
- The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes
Conversations, Conversation Starters
- Conversationally Speaking : Tested New Ways to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness
- How To Start A Conversation And Make Friends
- How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
- How To Win Friends and Influence People
- The Complete Book of Questions: 1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion
- The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression!
- What Do I Say Next?: Talking Your Way to Business and Social Success
Coping Skills
- 104 Activities That Build: Self-Esteem, Teamwork, Communication, Anger Management, Self-Discovery, Coping Skills
- Coping with Difficult Bosses
- Dealing with People You Can’t Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst
Crucial Conversations, Difficult Conversations, Confrontations
- Crucial Confrontations: Tools for Resolving broken promises, violated expectations, and bad behavior
- Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High
- Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
- Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time
- Lifescripts: What to Say to Get What You Want in Life’s Toughest Situations
Forgiving
- Forgive and Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don’t Deserve (Plus)
- Forgiveness Is a Choice: A Step-By-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope (Apa Lifetools)
- The Art of Forgiving
- Total Forgiveness
Habits, Principles, Practices
- How to Instantly Connect with Anyone: 96 All-New Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
- Mastering Personal and Interpersonal Skills: Key Techniques for Effective Decision-Making and Personal Success (Masters S.)
- Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success
- Winning with People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time
Influence, Persuasion, Rapport
- Covert Persuasion: Psychological Tactics and Tricks to Win the Game
- Get Anyone to Do Anything: Never Feel Powerless Again–With Psychological Secrets to Control and Influence Every Situation
- Get Them On Your Side
- Influence: Science and Practice (5th Edition)
- Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (Collins Business Essentials)
- Introducing NLP: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)
- Leadership Through People Skills
- Persuasion Skills Black Book: Practical NLP Language Patterns for Getting The Response You Want
- Positive Impacts: Discovering the Keys to Better Interpersonal Skills
- The Art of Woo: Using Strategic Persuasion to Sell Your Ideas
- The Power of Nice: How to Conquer the Business World With Kindness
- The Psychology of Persuasion: How To Persuade Others To Your Way Of Thinking
- The Science of Influence: How to Get Anyone to Say “Yes” in 8 Minutes or Less!
- Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive
Interpersonal Skills
- Interpersonal Skills in Organizations
- Messages: The Communication Skills Book
, by by Suzanne de Janasz
- Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships
Meetings, Events
- Good in a Room: How to Sell Yourself (and Your Ideas) and Win Over Any Audience
- How to Work a Room, Revised Edition: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing
- The Art of Mingling: Proven Techniques for Mastering Any Room
- Thinking on Your Feet: How to Communicate Under Pressure
Negotiation Skills
- Bargaining for Advantage: Negotiation Strategies for Reasonable People 2nd Edition
- Getting Past No
- Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
- Secrets of Power Negotiating
, by Roger Dawson
Networking
- Masters of Networking: Building Relationships for Your Pocketbook and Soul
- Personal Village, How to Have People in Your Life by Choice, Not Chance
Relationships
- Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex
- Relationships 101 (Maxwell, John C.)
- Unlimited Power : The New Science Of Personal Achievement
- Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last
Strategies, Tactics
- Executive Power: Use the Greatest Collection of Psychological Strategies to Create an Automatic Advantage in Any Business Situation
- PeopleSmart: Developing Your Interpersonal Intelligence
- The Hard Truth About Soft Skills: Workplace Lessons Smart People Wish They’d Learned Sooner
Teamwork
- Antipatterns: Identification, Refactoring, and Management (Auerbach Series on Applied Software Engineering)
- Collaboration: How Leaders Avoid the Traps, Create Unity, and Reap Big Results
- Teamwork 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know (101 (Thomas Nelson))
- The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork Workbook: Embrace Them and Empower Your Team
- The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable (J-B Lencioni Series)
Trust
- The Conversation: How Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships
- The Courage to Trust: A Guide to Building Deep and Lasting Relationships
- The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything
- Trust & Betrayal in the Workplace: Building Effective Relationships in Your Organization, Second edition