“He that respects himself is safe from others. He wears a coat of mail that none can pierce.” — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
If you want respect, first look to the source.
The source is you.
Like so many things, respect flows from the inside out., and self-respect is the strongest stream. You get what you expect. So first, you have to expect it from yourself. So the question becomes, do you respect yourself the way you want to be respected?
In the book, It’s Not About You: A Little Story of What Matters Most In Business, by Bob Burg and John David Mann, the authors share the secret of respect … it comes from you, not from others.
Trust Yourself
Lead by example. If you want people to trust you, first trust yourself.
“… I’m not talking about gaining their respect. I’m talking about your respect. You want those people to trust you? Trust yourself. Listen, humility doesn’t mean self-abasement, or devaluing your own worth.
You can only be genuinely humble if you have enormous self-respect. That’s something I learned from Pindar, even though I never met him — because it shines through the people he associates with, the people I have met.”
Respect from Others is a Reflection, Not the Source
Don’t look to others to find your respect. Respect yourself first. Burg and Mann write:
“Self-respect is where every other kind of respect comes from. Respect from others is a reflection, not the source. It’s not like, ‘Oh, if my boss respected me, if my son respected me, if the world respected me, that would be great, …’ as if having respect from those other people would somehow generate your own respect for yourself.”
Respect is a reflection of self-respect.
It starts from the inside out.
How Life Leaves a Mark